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Formal events can be joyful occasions, but for kids who learn and think differently, they can also bring a host of challenges. With unfamiliar routines, new places, and sensory demands, it's no surprise that these environments might cause meltdowns or anxiety. The good news is that with a little preparation and insight, you can help your child navigate these occasions more easily and enjoyably.

Here are seven common triggers at formal events and strategies to help your child feel more comfortable.

1. Restrictive clothing

Due to sensory sensitivity, some children find dressy garments such as button-down shirts, tights, or fancy shoes unpleasant or overpowering. The pain might swiftly turn into distress.

Prioritize your child's comfort over their appearance. Choose soft, breathable textiles such as cotton and remove any bothersome tags or seams. Make sure clothing fits well but isn’t too tight. If possible, let your child change into more comfortable clothes after key moments like ceremonies or group photos. If relatives express concerns, assure them that a calm child will brighten everyone's day.

2. Long periods of sitting still.

Ceremonies, formal dinners, and worship sessions frequently include long periods of silent sitting, which can be especially difficult for children who need to move or squirm to remain calm.

Bring small, quiet fidget toys such as stress balls or Silly Putty to keep their hands occupied. Sit near an exit so your child can take a break if needed. If the event is long, consider allowing your child to join midway or step out for short intervals. Communicate with event organizers or church leaders about your child's requirements ahead of time; they may be more understanding than you realize.

3. Physical contact

Handshakes, embraces, and even dancing might be overwhelming for children who want their own space. Physical touch may be especially uncomfortable for children with heightened sensory sensitivities.

What to do: Prepare your child in advance by role-playing common interactions they might encounter. For kids who can’t handle physical contact, teach alternative greetings like smiling, waving, or making eye contact. If family members seem unsure how to approach, gently explain your child’s preferences to avoid awkward moments.


4. Unfamiliar rituals and expectations.

Kids may feel anxious or restless if they don’t understand the purpose or sequence of an event, like a religious service or formal gathering.

What to do: Before the event, walk your child through what to expect—the schedule, people who will be there, behavior expectations, and any rituals or customs. Review this strategy in the morning and on the way to the event. During breaks, inform them of what's coming up, so they're reassured and prepared.

5. Sensory overload

Noisy settings, bright lights, and large crowds can be distressing for children with sensory issues. Even children without sensory sensitivities may struggle to concentrate in a hectic setting.

What to do: Pack headphones or earplugs to reduce noise and provide comfort items like a favorite book or coloring activity. Establish a quiet “retreat space” where your child can take breaks when feeling overstimulated. Consider how long you'll be at the event—it's better to leave early than to stay and risk a meltdown.

6. Struggling with Small Talk

Talking to relatives or family friends, especially those they don't see often, might be scary for children who are unsure what to say or how to respond.

What to do: Practice conversation starters and basic social skills with your child beforehand. Role-play scenarios in which they must identify themselves or answer basic queries such as "How's school?" Reassure them that taking breaks is acceptable and tell them that they can contact you if they feel overwhelmed during chats.

7. Unknown foods

Many formal events centre around food, which can be difficult for finicky eaters or children who have sensory issues or allergies.

What to do: Pack safe, familiar snacks that your child enjoys. While it is fantastic to encourage kids to try new things, don't put them under pressure—formal events are not the time to enforce new eating habits. Focus on making mealtime a positive experience, even if that means your child eats their favorite packed snack while others enjoy the banquet.

Final thoughts

Formal events don’t have to be a source of stress for your family. By anticipating your child’s needs and preparing in advance, you can create an environment that allows them to enjoy the occasion in their own way. Remember, a happy and comfortable child will make the day more meaningful for everyone involved.

With a little planning and a lot of understanding, you can help your child feel involved and at peace at any event or occasion!

Dear parents,

Parent-teacher meetings can sometimes feel overwhelming; with a bit of preparation, you can approach them with confidence. Here are four key tips to keep in mind:
Preparation is Key: Review your child’s schoolwork ahead of time and jot down questions you’d like to ask.
Speak Up: If you’ve noticed your child struggling in any area, bring it up. Your perspective is invaluable.
Discuss Learning Differences: If you suspect any potential learning differences, consider talking with your child’s teacher about an evaluation. Early intervention can have a significant impact.
View the Meeting as a Partnership: Remember, you and the teacher are working together to support your child’s academic success.

To make these meetings as effective as possible, EPCA has developed a set of tools specifically designed to help parents engage in meaningful conversations with teachers, formulate thoughtful questions, and set clear goals. These resources, including checklists and meeting tips, are available in this newsletter to ensure you feel fully equipped to build a positive working relationship with your child’s educators.

Recent events have highlighted the importance of maintaining open, two-way communication between home and school. This shared responsibility relies on parents actively participating in school activities, attending meetings, and openly sharing relevant information about their children. Building trust during positive times creates a strong foundation, making it much easier to navigate challenges when they arise. In unfortunate circumstances when challenges do arise, there are steps that parents can take - I refer you to two places to make sure you know about our complaints system: The National Student Ombudsman website and a recent blog post by EPCA on the subject. Finally, understanding the school’s complaints procedure is essential. While schools are responsible for informing parents about this process, it’s also important for us as parents to be familiar with it and to know whom to contact should any concerns arise.

Warm regards,

Katherine Korakakis
President,
English Parents’ Committee Association

Ometz in partnership with EPCA presents Cultivate Lifelong Bonds: Discover transformative strategies to nurture strong, loving sibling relationships that endure through all stages of life. The speaker is world renowned expert Corinna Jenkins Tucker, Ph.D., C.F.L.E., Director, Sibling Aggression and Abuse Research and Advocacy Initiative (SAARA), Crimes against Children Research Center.

In this webinar Real-World Solutions will be shared and you will receive practical tips tailored to your family’s needs that you can implement immediately for a more harmonious home. 

To register: https://jlive.app/events/8861

November 11, 2024
7:30 PM - 8:30 PM
Platform: Zoom (Link will be sent upon registration)
Language: English with French subtitles
Cost: Free

Join us for an insightful Campus Compass webinar featuring Darryl Climan, Academic Manager, as our special guest speaker. Darryl will guide us through the essentials of CEGEPs, from understanding the options available to selecting the best fit for your teen’s future.

This free session is perfect for parents, guardians, and students looking to make informed choices about CEGEPs. Don’t miss out—register, share, and attend!

Date and Time: November 20^th 7:00 p.m. to 8:15 p.m.
Location: Zoom
Registration Link: https://us02web.zoom.us/meeting/register/tZctcuGtqj8iGtE-CFX4T87_exTFof7pCiWd

We look forward to seeing you there!

Despite the fact that the school boards (CB) implemented a new complaints procedure a year ago, many parents continue to struggle with the process. Questions frequently arise: What are the necessary steps? Who should I contact? In what order, and by what means?

It is critical to understand that the complaints process consists of three steps. You cannot proceed directly to the third step; instead, you must begin at the beginning. If your first thought is to contact the national student ombudsman, you're missing important first steps.

If you have any questions, please contact us at president@epcaquebec.org, and we will gladly point you in the right direction.

What are the steps in the complaint process?

Step 1: Address the issue to the school's principal.
Step 2: Contact the person in charge of handling complaints at your school board.
Step 3: Contact the regional student ombudsman.

What are the deadlines for each step?

Step 1: 10 working days (roughly two weeks, possibly longer if holidays are involved).
Step 2: 15 Working Days (approximately three weeks, possibly extended due to statutory holidays)
Step 3: 20 working days (about four weeks, possibly more if there is a statutory holiday).

Do all complaints have to be made in writing?  

While you can file a complaint verbally, submitting it in writing is preferable to ensure that there is a record. At the third stage, a written complaint is required. If you're having trouble putting your complaint in writing or lack access to technology, help is available at 1-833-420-5233.

Who can make a complaint or report an incident?

Anyone who witnessed an event, has concerns, or is experiencing a problem may file a complaint or report. Individuals aged fourteen and up can do so on their own behalf.

Where can I find the contact information for the person in charge of handling complaints at my school's board?

This person typically is the secretary general. Their contact information can be found in the complaints section of school boards website.

When things aren't going well, knowing how to file a complaint can reduce stress and save you time. Following these simple steps will help you resolve issues more smoothly. Remember that our Advisory Services are available to assist you along the way.

A study on the use of artificial intelligence in education and related issues is currently being conducted by researchers affiliated with CIRANO (Interuniversity Research Center for the Analysis of Organisations, based in Montreal) and OBVIA (International Observatory on the Societal Impacts of Artificial Intelligence and Digital Technologies, based in Laval).

The study was commissioned by the Ministry of Education of Quebec. Its aim is to understand the perceptions of parents of Quebec schoolchildren regarding the issues surrounding artificial intelligence and the use of school data. This study would also enable us to understand the impressions and views of parents regarding the benefits and risks of such tools if they were deployed in schools.

The questionnaire is online, contains around 30 questions and takes around 15 minutes to complete. 

The survey invites you to answer various types of questions, including:
Socio-demographic questions ;
Reactions to statements about benefits, risks and trust in certain players in society ;

Two case studies that invite you to explore practical cases where artificial intelligence technology is introduced for use in the classroom.

Even if you don't think you have a stance or a good understanding of these concepts, your opinion is important!

The results of the study sould be available online on the CIRANO and OBVIA websites in winter 2025.

Participation is voluntary and unrestricted. All participation is anonymous, and no information other than the answers to the questions asked will be collected.

You can access the online questionnaire by clicking on the link below.

https://hecmontreal.eu.qualtrics.com/jfe/form/SV_0HcChJKLGc9A3mm

Thank you in advance for your participation! 

Dear Parents,

As the school year begins and our children settle into their routines, things are starting to smooth out. We recognize that not every child adjusts easily to new beginnings, but rest assured, we are committed to supporting you. Our goal is to equip parents with the tools and resources you need to advocate for and support your child during this period of transition. If you know of any parents who are new to the education system and need help, feel free to refer them to us.

The EPCA team has been busy over the past few weeks, developing new tools, videos, workshops, and resources to better serve parents. We’ve also launched the latest edition of the “Ask a President” series, where parents ask questions, and we respond! If you have pressing concerns or topics that keep you up at night, we encourage you to reach out and ask.

Throughout September, schools are holding their Annual General Assemblies (AGAs). If you haven’t yet seen it, EPCA offers valuable information in EPCA’s Guides for Parent Governance & Involvement. These assemblies are a great way for you to get involved and support your child’s education. Don’t hesitate to participate!

School board commissioner elections are also approaching on November 3. If you’ve considered running, there’s still time to submit your nomination before the September 29 deadline. It’s crucial that parents mobilize and make their voices heard. Encourage your friends and family to get on the voters' list and ensure they vote—your voice matters! 

Looking ahead, keep an eye out for two key events: the C.A.R.E. Conference and the Roots & Branches Pearl Lebowitz workshop. Also, in mid-October, there will be a hybrid focus group session with ABEE (Advisory Board on English Education). Be sure to check the details later in this newsletter.

Finally, don’t forget to like, follow, and share EPCA’s content to stay updated on everything we’re working on.

Katherine Korakakis
President, English Parents' Committee Association

Ask our President

Question: Why does my child hate school, especially during back-to-school time when other kids seem excited?

Presidents Answer 

Kids say they hate school for many different reasons. Children with learning and thinking differences often experience negative messaging from teachers and peers and that can be hurtful and can certainly be a contributing factor for a child’s dislike of school. Kids who struggle academically and socially often suffer from anxiety as well, and that makes facing school more challenging. Tests, homework, “boring” lessons, mean kids etc. can all make a child’s school experience difficult. When kids say they hate school it is important to listen to them, validate their feelings, and try to zero in on what is causing this big feeling. 

For little kids, it might be just the idea of separating from home that causes feelings of uneasiness and fear. A bus ride or having a locker for the first time can trigger anxiety. Older kids might have concerns about their ability to keep up academically or to fit in socially
 that causes them to say they hate school.

Conclusion

Once you determine what is causing your child’s negative feelings about school, you can work with your child, the school and appropriate professionals to address their concerns in a proactive and positive way. Going back to school and getting back on a good schedule takes work and often heightens anxiety. Listening to your kids and working with them to develop some strategies to deal with their concerns will make the adjustment easier.

As the new school year begins, expect to receive an invoice outlining the items needed for the year, along with a letter from the school. It’s important to understand the responsibilities that fall on both you as a parent and the school.

As per the Education Act, EPCA offers a clear explanation of the sections below.

"Materials that are used for personal use and personal organization," such as pens, pencils, paper, pencil cases, backpacks, binders, school uniforms (if applicable, specific conditions apply), and physical education clothing, can be broadly classified as items for which parents are responsible. In essence, parents are responsible for non-reusable items that cannot be returned to the school. See below for more information on the grey areas of parental responsibility.

Items that can be used by multiple students and must be returned to the school at the end of the school year cannot be charged to parents. For instance, if a textbook is required for a class, the school must provide it, either in full or through printed pages, along with technology supplies, safety goggles, sports equipment, and other materials.

Be aware there are some exceptions!

While schools may request that parents provide personal supplies and suggest specific colors for duo-tangs, pencil styles, or binders with pockets, they cannot require parents to purchase a specific brand or buy from a particular supplier.

This rule also applies to school uniforms.

When a single company supplies or manufactures the uniforms, alternative options must be offered. For instance, the school can set standards for the uniform's style and color (e.g., long-sleeved shirts, shorts, blue skirts, pants, etc.) and offer a crest with the school logo that parents can affix to the garment at a reasonable cost.

In all cases, if parents are required to pay a fee, it must only reflect the actual cost of the item—schools are not allowed to profit from the sale of crests.

Are you familiar with the Regulation regarding free instructional materials and who it applies to?

According to Article 10 of the Education Act: Regulations governing free use of teaching materials and certain financial contributions that may be required, items specified in the Minister's budget, such as tissue paper and health and hygiene products, must be supplied by the school.

ALSO!!! 

Any educational materials, such as teaching aids, required for activity programs or curriculum instruction must be provided free of charge. This includes:

- Protective gear like helmets, safety glasses, and hairnets.
- Art supplies such as paint, pastels, clay, and modeling materials.
- Technological devices, including headphones, laptops, and graphing calculators.

"Any financial contribution required for a service, activity, material not covered by the right of free use, or student supervision during lunchtime must be clearly itemized on a detailed invoice." This means the school must provide a clear invoice specifying the purpose of each item and its exact cost. Additionally, "If a voluntary contribution or donation is requested, no amount related to it may appear on the total invoice." The school's governing board is responsible for reviewing and approving the school supply list and informing the school of the approved items.

What about padlocks? It varies. If the school does not provide combination locks, you will likely need to purchase your own. However, if the school supplies the lock (already installed on the locker), there will be no charge to the parent. In many cases, high schools sell the lock, which is convenient as they will have a key to access it if your child forgets the combination. A security deposit may be required if the lock isn’t returned by the end of the year.

If you choose to purchase your own combination lock, request that the associated fee be removed from your bill when you return the school's borrowed padlock.

Printing and Photocopying: Important Considerations

It’s essential to double-check the invoice to ensure you are being charged the correct amount, as schools are only permitted to bill for the actual cost of goods or services. Pay particular attention to charges related to printing and photocopying, especially in high school. Fees may apply for photocopies of materials such as student assignments, drawings, or cutouts, but these costs should be clearly outlined and subject-specific.

Example: Secondary 4 - Printing Fees
- $8 for French
- $5 for Math
- $3 for English
- $4 for History

Parents can only be charged for documents that replace an activity or exercise book.

Important Reminder!

Invoices must not mention any possibility of, or suggest an amount for, personal donations. Asking for donations is never allowed! Any contributions must be entirely voluntary, and parents should never feel pressured to donate.

To clarify what is and isn’t applicable, the Ministry of Education has provided the following guide:

When in doubt you can always consult the ministry's checklist or the visit parents.quebec  to learn more about the Parent’s Financial Contributions under FAQ’s. 

You can also contact the EPCA's by e-mail (president@epcaquebec.org). We'll be happy to answer your questions or direct you to the right resources.

Dear parents,

As we begin the new school year, I'd like to extend a warm welcome back to all our students, parents, and school communities. The start of the school year is always a time of renewed energy, new possibilities, and, of course, new challenges. But I am confident that we will rise to meet them, as we have in the past.

This year, the English Parents’ Committee Association (EPCA) is more dedicated than ever to supporting you, the parents. We understand that navigating the educational system can be difficult, which is why we're here to help you every step of the way.

I'm excited to announce that we will once again offer a series of workshops designed specifically for parents. These workshops cover a wide range of topics, including understanding your child's curriculum and effectively advocating for your child's needs. Whether you are a new parent in our school system or have been involved for many years, there is something for everyone. These sessions are intended to provide you with the knowledge and tools necessary to support your children's educational journey.

In addition to the workshops, we have several tools and resources to help you throughout the school year. Our website offers guides, checklists, and video tutorials on topics ranging from school registration to special education resources. You can find our Guides for Parent Governance & Involvement HERE.

While we all want to start the year on a positive note, we must acknowledge that we will no doubt also face challenges. There will be challenges in adapting to new regulations, addressing ongoing staffing shortages, and ensuring that all students receive necessary supports. However, I am confident that by working together—as parents, educators, and community members—we can overcome these obstacles and provide a nurturing and productive environment for our children.

Let us make this school year one of collaboration, resilience, and achievement. EPCA is here to guide you and work with you, and we're excited to keep building a strong and vibrant school community together.

Wishing you all a great start to the school year!

Katherine Korakakis
President, English Parents' Committee Association